Short Lived
by Saber Wing
Summary: Roses were fragile, pitiful things; red or white, thorns or not. Each was as vulnerable as any other to the chill of a frigid winter breeze. Ritsuka x Soubi


_**Author's note: **_My first Loveless fanfic, as well as the first yaoi I have written!

*stares* Yes, I know it's considered shounen-ai, but yaoi is a pretty reversible term, don't you think? Haha. I absolutely adore this series. I liked the anime, though the manga beats it by a long shot. I've always wanted to write for this fandom, and a plot bunny popped into my head, so I ran with it. Anyway, I don't own Loveless or any of the adorable characters involved. Only this story and the computer I'm typing it on are mine. On with the story!

**Short- Lived**

**By: Angel Wings-008**

Blood, rich and crimson, flowed steadily from the wound in his head, running down his forehead to drip into his eyes. Ritsuka Aoyagi wiped it away, clearing his vision enough so he could see the damage. Mother had really gone all out this time.

Ritsuka had just come home from an outing with Yuiko and Yayoi; it had been fun to hang out with them…he liked being with them. However, this morning he'd forgotten to tell his mother where he was going. She normally didn't care where he went as long as he was home by curfew, so he'd thought it wouldn't matter. Had he ever been wrong…the second he'd walked through the door, she'd started yelling at him, picked up a vase from the table in the hallway, and cracked it over his head.

The pain was horrible now that the initial numbness had worn off, and Ritsuka was so dizzy he had to struggle to focus long enough to find the first-aid kit that Soubi had insisted he keep. Now, he was glad he'd agreed to that.

He soaked one of his old shirts in antiseptic, and with a moan, pressed it to the wound, biting his lip to keep from crying. He hoped there wasn't any glass left…he'd tried to pick it all out, but…

He sighed, tired of everything._ How long do I have to do this? Why me? _Ritsuka thought, curling up on the floor as he gave in to his despair. It was times like these when he wished more than ever that the real Ritsuka would wake up. Mother would be happy, right? He was just a substitute, a pale imitation of the person he use to be. It wasn't his mother's fault that she wanted her son back. She was so angry all the time, but that was alright. It was his fault, wasn't it?

_Where are you…?_ He wondered to himself; his Fighter unit had told him this morning as he'd walked him to school that he'd be out of touch for most of the day. Was he back by now? _Soubi, you jerk. _Always breaking promises, and lying to him.

Soubi was always telling him that he loved him, that to him, Ritsuka was his life; his rose in the springtime. He was always comparing his so called beauty and strength to that of resilient roses, however resilient that was, which wasn't much, as far as Ritsuka was concerned.

Roses were fragile, pitiful things; red or white, thorns or not. Each was as vulnerable as any other to the chill of a frigid winter breeze. They were pretty on the outside, but inside they were weak and meaningless. Maybe Soubi did have it right. Ritsuka was just like a rose, just as fragile, short-lived, and useless. He'd disappear, and no one would care.

Ritsuka, still holding the cloth to his head, hugged his legs to his chest with his other arm, shaking so violently his teeth almost chattered.

_ "Ritsuka! Ritsuka! What did you do with my Ritsuka? You aren't him! You're always leaving without telling me where you go. My little boy would never do that, never!" his mother screamed, the ever present, crazed gleam shining in her eyes. _

_ "Mother wait, please. I'm sorry, I…"_

_ "No! You're not Ritsuka, don't talk to me! I'll make you give him back! I'll make you!" She snatched a vase full of flowers from the table, paying Ritsuka's desperate screams no mind as she smashed it over his head._

The scene played over and over in his head as he desperately clung to consciousness, tears now spilling over his long lashes and dripping off of his cheeks. It was a miracle he'd been able to get up the stairs, so weak and dizzy from loss of blood. He thought it had slowed down since, but he couldn't be sure. He couldn't be sure of anything anymore.

"Soubi, I need you_…_" he whimpered, no longer caring to hide it. He was Ritsuka Aoyagi. He didn't need anyone. What a joke…he'd never been able to convince even himself of that, so why try now?

Ritsuka gave in to the weakness in his body and collapsed onto the floor, digging in his pants pocket as best he could in an attempt to find his cell phone. When he found it, he quickly flipped through the contacts and hit Soubi's number, hoping he would answer, like he always promised he would.

After a few rings had gone by and just as Ritsuka was beginning to panic, he heard the sound of the other end being picked up, and the most beautiful voice he'd ever heard spoke through the phone.

"Hello, Ritsuka? I was about to call you. Is something wrong? I just got the strangest feeling."

Now that he could hear Soubi's voice, he wanted to see him even more desperately. Just this once, he wanted someone to hold him and tell him everything was alright; that he was loved, wanted, needed…. Even if it was a lie, maybe it would keep him going for just one more day, though he didn't deserve even that much longer.

He tried to speak, but no sound came out; nothing could be heard but the pitiful whimpering of a child who'd been through more than he ever should have.

"Ritsuka, answer me. Please, tell me what's wrong," Soubi urged, now sounding scared, and a little bit frantic. That was unlike him. Ritsuka always admired his ability to keep calm in any situation.

"C-Could you c-come? P-Please?" Ritsuka managed, though his voice shook so much, he hoped his Fighter had understood him. He was slipping off the edge, and he desperately needed someone to pull him back.

"It's that damn woman! She hurt you again, didn't she?" Normally the young man didn't let much anger him, but Soubi sounded furious now. Try as he might, the boy couldn't find the strength to answer, instead dissolving into sobs he couldn't hope to control. It was all the answer he needed.

"I'm coming. I'll be there soon, I promise you. I love you Ritsuka, be strong for me. I'm on my way," Soubi told him, his voice tender and soothing. He wanted to answer him, to hear his voice, but it was getting so hard to focus. Despite his best efforts, dizziness overcame him, and his eyes slid shut. Ritsuka felt himself slip into unconsciousness, vaguely wondering if it would be for the last time as Soubi screamed his name.

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Drifting endlessly…that was the way Ritsuka felt as he slowly emerged from the darkness. He felt a little nauseous, as if the room was moving, but he knew that probably wasn't true. His head throbbed painfully; he probably wasn't dead then. Too bad…he caused nothing but trouble.

Ritsuka wished this were one of those cliché Shojo manga that Yuiko liked, because then maybe he would have lost his memory like so many characters in the books. God only knew he wished he couldn't remember anything that had happened…better yet; he wished the real Ritsuka had taken the opportunity to wake up.

He still felt a little dizzy, but the terrible chill he hadn't been able to get rid of before was gone now, replaced with such a comfortable warmth, Ritsuka was tempted to slip back into dreamland. Nothing could touch him there…nothing could harm him, not even himself. But, just as he began to slip back into unconsciousness, something stopped him; a gentle hand caressed the top of his head, idly toying with the soft ears that Soubi so adored.

_Could it be…?_

Slowly, Ritsuka pried his eyes open to see that he was lying on a bed in a dimly lit room, swathed in fluffy blankets and wearing what he assumed was a pair of his own pajamas. Wrapped around his forehead and extending to the top of his scalp was a thick bandage, so prominent Ritsuka didn't even need to reach up to know it was there. Sitting at the top of the bed, Ritsuka's head in his lap, was Soubi; strong arms wrapped around his young Sacrifice as he stroked his hair.

"Ritsuka! Thank goodness. I was so worried," Soubi said, wearing a smile that only just spoke of the relief he felt.

"Soubi…you came. But where am I now…?" Ritsuka asked, puzzled. Where had he taken him?

"I took you to my place. Kio is out for a few days, so it was perfect. There was no way I was going to allow you to stay with that woman right now," he replied, anger flashing in his blue eyes, but he quickly subdued it, instead smiling tenderly down at Ritsuka, gently caressing his cheek. "She'll never hurt you again, not if I can help it. I don't care what I have to do."

"But Soubi, it's not her fault…she just wants her Ritsuka back. I'm not him. She doesn't need me. No one does. Why should she?" he questioned softly, tears burning behind his eyes, but he held them back somehow. Soubi was worried enough about him as it was…

"I need you. Ritsuka, you are my life, my heart, and my soul. Without you, I could never exist," he crooned, in that soft, loving voice that always sent shivers down his spine. He didn't deserve that! Damn it, he couldn't love Soubi! His Fighter deserved better than him!

"You're lying!" he shouted, his voice cracking. "You always lie. Stop saying that to me!"

The Fighter locked eyes with him, his gaze almost as intense as that of the face he wore during their spell battles together. "It's the truth. In the beginning, I was only following orders. Seimei's word was law; he was judge, jury, and executioner to me. His orders were all that mattered. He told me to love you and I obeyed, but I never expected this. I never expected to love you so much. Ritsuka, when I think of never seeing your face, of you being dead and gone from me…I can't breathe," Soubi choked, turning his face away from Ritsuka's, but not before the boy saw tears glistening in his eyes. A drop escaped and slid down his pale cheek, and Ritsuka, shocked, reached up to brush it off. He'd never seen Soubi like this, and he hated it. He felt as if his heart was breaking too.

Was that what love was…? Sharing everything, even the pain?

Soubi, his eyes misty, reached up to hold Ritsuka's hand to his cheek, bringing it to his lips to brush a kiss upon it. Ritsuka shivered, though it was a pleasant feeling this time. He couldn't identify it, but then again, he wasn't sure he wanted to.

"Do you understand? I need you here with me. Always. " His words were gentle, and yet they were filled with longing.

"I…thank you Soubi. I need you too. I really do. You know that, right? You won't leave me?" Ritsuka asked, terrified of the thought of Soubi disappearing from his life. When had the man become such a big part of him? Somehow, he'd become as important as the air he breathed.

"Never. I'd die first." His fighter said it with such conviction, Ritsuka had to believe it. "Stay here with me, just for a few days. I'll take care of excusing you from school, and don't worry about your mother. She won't be waking up for quite awhile," Soubi said, his smile just a bit too happy for Ritsuka's taste. His eyes widened abruptly, then he glared up at Soubi.

The effect wasn't exactly what Ritsuka was aiming for. Instead of shrinking away, Soubi laughed. Of course; he always laughed at the things he did. Ritsuka honestly didn't understand why Soubi found him so funny, but it kind of made him angry. "Don't worry, I didn't hurt her, no matter how much I wanted to. I just put her to sleep. It'll last at least several days. Maybe a week, if we're lucky," he informed his Sacrifice gleefully. Ritsuka scowled, but it was forced, and they both knew it.

"Jerk," Ritsuka muttered, snuggling into Soubi. The Fighter shifted his position to make his Sacrifice more comfortable, and snuggled him more securely to his chest.

Soubi gently turned his face down to Ritsuka's, and for once, he didn't bother to resist. Ritsuka lifted his head to meet him, joining their lips together in a sweet, soft kiss. It wasn't one of those urgent, fiery kisses Soubi had given him before; this one instead, spoke of tenderness and love.

When they broke apart, his Fighter smiled in contentment, and Ritsuka couldn't help but do the same. Soubi pressed his lips against Ritsuka's cheek, the younger blushing in response. "Beautiful...strong. You really are a rose. Sometimes they bend and break when the wind blows them down, but the resilient ones spring back up to live another day. Winter comes and then they whither, but come the spring, the seeds that those strong roses left behind begin to bloom, and the flowers are reborn again. Though they are seen as short-lived, they live on when other blossoms take root, and all because they were strong enough to make it through their cycle of life. Just like you, my Ritsuka. Beautiful inside and out, and stronger than you should ever have to be. You never break under the pressure of the wind."

Was that how he thought of him? Not as a fragile, useless flower, as Ritsuka saw it, but a strong, resilient one? Ritsuka blushed an even deeper red, moved by what his Fighter had said; however, something still bothered him. "But Soubi, they're never the same as they were before. It's a different life, even if they bloom again," Ritsuka pointed out, trying to understand. Soubi merely held his smile.

"Even if they are different than before, does that make them any less valuable? They move on proudly, whether their lives are short or long. Tell me, Ritsuka. In light of such determination, would it be fair to forsake a beautiful rose, simply because it was different from another one?"

Startled, Ritsuka's violet eyes widened as he gazed into Soubi's earnest blue ones. Hesitantly, he took it in, but then Ritsuka smiled softly in wonder. He'd never seen a rose that way before. Maybe he just needed someone to help him change his mind.

Tired, but happy, Ritsuka wrapped his small arms around Soubi's chest, snuggling down to rest his head in his lap once more. Just as he was drifting off, Soubi's warm lips pressed a kiss upon the top of his head, and he whispered the words that sent his young love to sleep.

"I love you, my sweet rose."

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Aww…I made myself cry as I was writing this fic. My poor little Ritsuka, but in the end, he prevails with the help of Soubi's love.

Thanks so much for reading. Reviews would be great ^_^. They're always appreciated.


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